From Monogamy To Open Marriage: Our First Time At A Swinger Club (Part 2)

Image: Flickr (ken)

From Monogamy To Open Marriage is a weekly column devoted to the discussion of pursuing sex and love outside marriage. 


(You can read Part One here.)

The following week, I decided to wear a dress I might not ever be seen in if I were going anywhere else. My makeup was heavier and more dramatic. We often discussed having fun with these special outings and encounters by changing our style, our approach, and even our mannerisms. We realized that this is why so many people refer to these experiences as “play.” Each time we meet someone or go somewhere new in this lifestyle, it takes us out of our usual mode in life. It gives us an opportunity to use our imaginations and take on different roles.

This is what it’s like to play as an adult. 

I put on a ¾ length coat, and as I stepped into the car, I wondered what would happen if we were in an accident. My husband’s phone had the GPS set to the address of this well-known swinger club in NYC. We had condoms in my purse and his wallet (again). I was wearing a really hot short leather lace-up dress with suspender stockings and no panties. Imagine what the headlines might read if we were in the kind of fatal accident that made the news. Imagine our kids coming to collect our belongings. Imagine if one of us died and the other survived and got to dwell on how life would be different if we'd stayed in and watched TV instead. Okay, don't. 

Compared to our previous experience, this club was a lot more exciting from the beginning. We went through a series of doors and short hallways to get to the entrance. We were carded by a bouncer and allowed inside. We were carded again, after being eyed up for a noticeably long time by two women and a man. After we paid our entrance fee and when we walked in, the first thing we saw was a naked couple dancing their hearts out. People were talking, laughing, mingling. All around the dancing couple, there were people dressed in clothing that made my dress and stockings seem prudish and conservative.

After a quick, slight jolt of anxiety, a sense of relief overtook me.

We would not be awkward and out of place in this club. It looked as though no one was. 

A woman greeted us, showed us where to put our coats, and offered us a lock for a locker. We put our things away and gave the bartender our bottle of wine. He wrote our names on a sticker, put it on the bottle, and poured us two glasses. We walked back toward the lounge area, and another woman made eye contact with us, patting the empty seats next to her as an invitation to sit. Before I knew it, we were talking and laughing like old friends. She offered to take us around, and we followed her. We breezed by several open rooms that were lined with not-quite-bed-but-not-quite-sectional-couch type furniture. There were people in various stages of undress and sexual activity in every room. The energy was captivating and intoxicating. I could feel the desire, excitement, joy, and pleasure exuding from each room. 

We followed her into a smaller room with one other couple in it. She suggested that we sit on the edge of the bed. Before my husband sat down, I reached for his waist and started to unfasten his belt. The woman approached him and slowly reached for the first button on his shirt. He smiled at me as she worked her way down to the other buttons and I pushed his pants down so he could step out of them. I kissed him with my eyes wide open so that I could watch the couple next to us.

My attention was diverted back to the woman when I realized one of her hands was under my dress while her other hand was helping my husband remove his boxers. Then I looked up and saw another couple watching us in the doorway. My shoes came off. My dress was lifted by more than two hands.

For the remainder of the night, my legs and mouth (consensually) opened for what seemed like a steady stream of pleasure.

This was how I imagined a night at a swinger club might go. No, this was better than I imagined. 

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