alcoholism

Photo by Rod Long on Unsplash

On Enabling: I Was Addicted To My Son's Addiction

There’s a big difference between helping your child and enabling their behaviors. When I discovered my son had an alcohol addiction, I was a single parent of two teenaged children.

The first time I saw my son Brian drunk, he was 14 years old. 

We had just moved from Missouri to New York State after my second divorce. I felt ill-equipped to deal with the painful reality that my son was repeating the cycle of his father, whom I had left due to his alcohol addiction.

When I ask myself how I became an enabler to his addiction, I reflect on my background. I grew up the oldest child in a family of four children. As the eldest, I was called on to be the caretaker of my younger siblings. The caretaking role felt comfortable and validating. When I left home at 18, I chose to pursue a career in nursing, further reinforcing my role as a caretaker.

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Eventually, I had to admit that the past I wanted to have — the mother I wished for so desperately — didn’t exist.

Re-parenting Myself As I Parent My Kids

Eventually, I had to admit that the past I wanted to have — the mother I wished for so desperately — didn’t exist. I am re-parenting myself as I parent.

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While it is true that binge-drinking among moms is reaching epidemic levels, it is not the act of mom-ing that got us there.

Three Things Only Moms Struggling With Alcoholism Will Understand

While it is true that binge-drinking among moms is reaching epidemic levels, it is not the act of mom-ing that got us there.

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I draw the line at “mommy juice.”

Your “Mommy Juice” Jokes Aren’t Funny — They're Dangerous

I draw the line at “mommy juice.” Some of you reading will tell me I’m too sensitive or we’ve just “gone too far”. And you’re right; I’m sensitive.

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That’s the thing about recovery: if you stick with it, it introduces you to yourself.

Addiction Recovery Forced Me To Sober Up About My Relationships

When I decided to get sober, I simply wanted help to stop drowning myself; I certainly didn’t envision digging up my painful relationship history.

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First, I tell her the love story, and also the heartbreak story, and she listens, even if she's heard so much of this before.

How My Alcoholic Ex Strengthened My Relationship With Our Daughter

As long as I give my daughter the space to talk, I feel like my alcoholic ex can strengthened my relationship with her. I hope she knows that I'm here.

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My husband is an addict; should I leave?

Ask Erin: My Husband Is An Addict; Should I Leave? 

I’m married to a guy who struggles with addictions to cocaine and alcohol. I've been with him for over a decade. My husband is an addict; should I leave?

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By Paul from United Kingdom (Kevin Spacey) [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

Kevin Spacey Comes Out As Gay, Makes Excuses For Shitty Behavior

Kevin Spacey comes out as a gay man but this does not give him a pass for being a predator. Call it what it is: pedophilia.

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