Eliana Osborn

If you kill a tortoise, even on accident, you probably shouldn’t have children.

The most important things my mother taught me included work from Neil Diamond, Billy Joel, Wham! and Whitney Houston.

My Life on the Road (or MLR) is not what I expected...the idea of not waiting for experience to come to you permeates the book.

Self-care is important. Massages are a good form of self-care. Too bad I keep thinking about what I'm going to make for dinner.

Your partner will make you want to throw up at some point. Pure, unadulterated disgust.

I wanted to write a book last summer. Then I realized what a terrible goal that was and modified accordingly.

My main reason for doing reading testing, enduring a bus ride to a field trip about weapons engineering, and other thrills? Stalking.

I’m a sucker for an interesting woman, so Notorious RBG is obviously my sort of book.

A haircut is a whole lot cheaper than therapy or tattoos or a round-the-world plane ticket.

I’ve developed a fast and furious passion for the new Daily Show host, Trevor Noah.