Eliana Osborn

Perfectly Karaoke Or Lip Sync A Song: You may think this is less important than the other items on the list. You are wrong.

I’m proud of you right now, even with all the sadness. Proud of you for heading to rehab, leaving the kids, the man, the house — all of it — to get on top of things. Doing it instead of just thinking about it, talking about it even, hemming and hawing? That’s pretty badass.

I’m not alone in being troubled by how people suddenly disappear in life, right? That’s essentially why the internet was created. You may have heard rumors about Al Gore inventing it for military purposes... Lies!

Full-fat dairy may be “healthier” for you than low-fat dairy. “May” be, as in, probably is, like with numbers and science and stuff.

When I’m staring at the wall trying to keep my cool when my 6-year-old is hysterical about the tiny bump on his finger, I attempt to channel some of the good parts.

We take weekend turns. He does vacations and summers. Literally. He takes them away. It is great.

I wanted to write a book last summer. Then I realized what a terrible goal that was and modified accordingly.

I cried every single day of my life until I was 18 years old. I did not know this was abnormal.

Ray Nagin. Yes, the former New Orleans mayor who now has a criminal record. Let me explain.

A haircut is a whole lot cheaper than therapy or tattoos or a round-the-world plane ticket.