Eliana Osborn

A haircut is a whole lot cheaper than therapy or tattoos or a round-the-world plane ticket.

"Sharknado 3" has an especially unique moment when a human baby is born by being cut out of the side of a shark. Don’t ask questions, there’s nothing to explain.

After this, I’m not going to be able to complain about Meghan Trainor and having to teach my son that "All About That Bass" is talking about girls with big booties.

I always have a small piece of my brain on mom mode, no matter what else is happening. I have no problem with this, since that is how humanity has survived.

Now that I’m a mother, I’m much more sympathetic to a woman who just couldn’t take it anymore. Not saying I’d leave my kids in a parking lot and hope for the best . . . just saying that I can understand the impulse.

84% of full professors in America are White. In case you were unsure, that does not match the overall makeup of the country or the student body.

We take weekend turns. He does vacations and summers. Literally. He takes them away. It is great.

When did I discover that sterilization isn’t as cut and dry as it seems? While sitting in a hospital gown, signing my life away, awaiting surgery.

1. Borrow a child.

I’m a sucker for an interesting woman, so Notorious RBG is obviously my sort of book.