In today's OMG FINALLY news: The Facebook dislike button. For years we have toiled, our clicking fingers at the ready, we have asked, pleaded even, for the Button of Holy Dislike-age. Our wish has been granted — well, sort of. Facebook says they're "working on it." Which I can only assume mean "doing it." First the middle finger emoji, and now this. Our lives are complete.
Well, actually, I'm not sure how I feel about a dislike button. It could be really useful, say when someone says anything nice about Donald Trump, or when someone posts a video of yet another impossible to bake cake. The list is extensive: racist shit, homophobic shit, sexist shit, sizeist shit, general assholery. Anytime your mom makes yet another comment about what a horrible baby you were. When your sister posts some passive aggressive shit about you disliking your mom's comment. Any time someone starts talking about the merits of the Republican party.
But, here's the other thing that would happen. You might post a picture of your baby and someone dislikes it and then you're like OMG IT'S A BABY YOU JERKFACE. Wait, is my baby NOT ADORABLE? Or what if you wear a bikini and you get like 17 likes and 18 dislikes and then you're like OMG I AM UGLY. Eighteen people said so.
While we are on the subject here are some other potentially useful buttons:
The OMG GO AWAY button: for when someone says anything negative about marriage equality.
The Hell Yeah button: for anytime someone mentions either coffee or margaritas.
The Thank God It's Not Just Me button: for when anyone mentions margaritas before noon.
The Thanks I've Got It Covered button: for anytime someone gives you ANY parenting advice.
The I Cannot Believe How Ignorant You Are button: for those who think #AllLivesMatter is a good idea
And finally, The Eff Off button: for anyone who still discusses the merits Sarah Palin.