Carrie Saum

Rosa made a chocolate cake with cinnamon and pecans that still haunts my dreams and my tastebuds, 20 years later. Here, I've tried to recreate it.

The shame was overwhelming. Why was my body broken? What had I done to my baby? I began to spiral into self-loathing. Gestational diabetes felt like a failure.

The Internet has told us that instead of selling our wild summer children to a band of traveling performers, we should go swimming with them instead. At a beach or at the pool, your choice. The Internet also told us that us moms should get over our silly body issues and just play! Have fun!

In the spirit of melted chocolate and simple, decadent expressions of love, I made a little treat for my friends.

Spring is fully coming to life this month.

This is by no means a comprehensive list of internalized toxic beliefs, but it’s a start. Keep fighting the good fight, friends.

Twice a year, I embark on a one to two week cleanse. I feel invigorated, I sleep better, my libido rises, and I'm able to use it as a reset to return to eating foods that make my body feel good.

But seriously, Babywatchers. STOP IT. It’s none of your business. Commenting on a woman’s body in general without any solicitation from the woman is not only unwanted, it’s inappropriate.

When I turned 21, my body crashed.

Gather anything orange, brown, olive green, harvest yellow, and dead. Dead leaves, dead flowers, dead hopes and dreams, and arrange them artistically on your front doorstep.