Carrie Saum

Visiting my family in the Sierra Nevada foothills is one of the great pleasures of my life. I get to work, cook, and play while my amazing folks keep an eye on my kid. My inspiration and productivity skyrocket when I'm able to step away from my version of the daily grind and get a little refocused and centered. The food I make tastes a little better, and I move a little easier without a three-year-old constantly in tow.

In an age where we are isolated but still technologically connected, this is important. It’s okay to be alone. It’s okay to be unoccupied.

I knew it was bound to happen.  

Rosa made a chocolate cake with cinnamon and pecans that still haunts my dreams and my tastebuds, 20 years later. Here, I've tried to recreate it.

We have all been there before. The stuck place. Your body feels heavy, your feet glued to the floor. Maybe you have a hard time getting out of bed. Maybe you feel sad about a relationship that is deteriorating or has completely dissolved. Maybe you just feel completely spent and worn out, and lack the energy to move at all. Or maybe you have this great big beautiful life you're afraid to step into and the fear has you paralyzed.

So, what do you do when you make something that looks a mess but tastes like the Virgin Mary give birth in your mouth? You add more sugar and salt to hide its minor imperfections and nobody gives a damn how it looks after the first bite.

Trail mix is a quick way to keep me from having a full-on hunger meltdown. I find it easier to whip up a batch of my own so I can control the ingredients and the quality.

I made you these cookies. They are special cookies that are made from pulverized cookies that became butter that then became cookies again.

Tamago kake gohan is made with hot sushi rice, an egg, soy sauce, and good dash of furikake (a traditional seaweed and sesame rice seasoning). It is comforting, filling, entirely satisfying, and stays with you for several hours. This is great fuel for a school day, a sick day, or a day spent hiking — or marathoning Project Runway.

When I have difficult life decisions or conflict with people who are close to me, I now have the working understanding of what peace truly looks like for me. It looks like freedom to be fully who I am.