Erin McKelle

Although it’s only been in the past year or so that I’ve developed a burning passion for psychology, I’ve always been fascinated by

I’ve said I was “good,” “fine,” or “doing well” after crying for hours, lying in bed all day with no motivation, and even experiencing suicidal ideation. My worst days are when the temptation to mask my pain with a smile is the strongest.

As I write this, it’s the eve of my 21st birthday, or the last step in my journey to adulthood. So. Many. Feels. I’m going to give you a list of the 21 things I’ve learned before turning 21, to look back at what I’ve learned and done so far:

I propose going back to basics, back to what self-care is supposed to be about. Instead of this new flashy and expensive self-care movement.

When you think of astrology, what first comes to mind? Is it your sun sign, the weekly horoscopes you see in newspapers, or a wonky new-agey scam? If you’re in the latter group, I’m here to tell you that astrology is not a crock of you-know-what, but actually has some historical merit to its practice.

I feel like indirect communication is a common thread amongst women. Since women are socially conditioned to not make a fuss, ruffle any feathers or have permission to speak our minds, indirect communication becomes inevitable. Or conversely, if we communicate directly, we’re often labeled in a negative manner, like bitch.

We’re now living in an age where online dating is no longer taboo, which means more people are going online to pursue finding a romantic partner than ever before. I've met almost all of my dating partners through the Internet, and through the courting process, profile creation, and setting up of the first IRL date, I’ve learned a lot about how to date online.

One reality TV franchise people often point to when talking about misogyny in the media is The Real Housewives. However, I believe that many aspects of The Real Housewives make it a feminist franchise.

Even though I've suffered from clinical depression ever since I was 15 years old, my depressive episodes have a lot more at stake as I’ve gotten older, especially since I’m dependent on my own productivity in order to survive.

I had known many people, and even had friends in college, who were in open and non-monogamous relationships. Things always seemed to work really well for them, and I had noticed that everyone was usually on the same page about what was happening in the relationship, which seemed to be a rarity, at least among straight couples.