Jody Allard

Drug addicted, homeless, and hungry don't add up to hilarity. Neither does the system that arrested this woman for stealing $32 worth of food in a country that throws away 263 millions pounds of food every day –– or a news cycle that chews up and spits out the needy for clicks and likes.

Wal-Mart, home to broken dreams, poor fashion choices, and a whole lot of guns.

If you're anything like me, the only enjoyable part of shopping at Costco is the samples. It's always packed, there's nowhere to park, people push their massive fucking carts slower than molasses in January, and everything about it makes me homicidal EXCEPT for the sweet, sweet lure of the samples.

Once upon a time, a band of heavily-armed men decided to take over an Oregon federal building. Because they were white, the Feds didn't shoot them in 12 seconds, and nobody even really did anything about it. (Possibly also because these intrepid defenders of our Constitution decided to seize a bird sanctuary.)

If you follow Humans of New York on Facebook like I do, you probably ugly cry at least once a day. Right now, they are interviewing Syrian refugees who have successfully completed the multi-year process to become approved to enter the United States, and their stories are particularly heart-breaking.

Now, you might be wondering how on Earth a teacher thought that a simple circuit board attached to a clock display was a bomb. And that would be a reasonable thing to wonder –– until you learn that the student detained was Ahmed Mohamed, a Muslim whose father immigrated from Sudan.

Contrary to what Donald Trump wants you to believe, mental illness doesn't give people easy access to the deadly weapons they use to commit mass murders. Likewise, despite what Bernie Sanders claims, high rates of gun ownership is linked to higher rates of gun violence and implementing sweeping gun control policies would make our country safer.

We're giving you some of that judgmental side eye right back, Chris.

It’s been three years since I divorced my mother. The reasons are long and complicated, yet also short and simple. My mother is not capable of mothering anyone, and I am healthier and happier without her.

ICYMI, "Sixteen and Pregnant" star's Nikkole Paulun's Facebook post about her monthly date nights with her six-year-old son is going viral –– and people are losing their shit over it for entirely the wrong reasons.