Jody Allard

Jody Allard

Bio

Jody Allard is a former techie turned freelance writer living in Seattle. Her online work has appeared on Time, xoJane, and Offbeat Home, among others. She writes primarily about food, family, mothering, and life with a chronic illness. 

Jody Allard Articles

The New Holderness Family's Thanksgiving Video Doesn't Suck

If you don't know who the Holderness family is and have somehow managed to miss their series of painfully awkward viral videos, congratulations! You haven't missed much.

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Pope Francis' New Policy on Abortion "Forgiveness" Misses The Mark

While this is, of course, better than excommunicating women for their reproductive choices, it is still founded on the premise that abortion is a sin and that men in power must absolve women of their mistakes. It also continues to paint women as incapable of understanding their options and making autonomous choices for their bodies and their lives.

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World's First Surviving Septuplets Turn 18, Proving We're All Really Old

In 1997, Kenny and Bobbi McCaughey made history when they welcomed the first set of surviving septuplets to the world. Now, 18 years later, as the septuplets prepare to leave the nest, the world has only one question: "How the hell did we all get so old?"

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Ben Carson Declares Muslims Unfit For Presidency, Apparently Can't Comprehend The Constitution

Carson's comments came in response to the shitshow that was Trump's campaign rally last week, where an attendee asked a question about how Trump would handle the "problem" that is Muslims in America, and incorrectly stated that President Obama is Muslim. Frankly, it doesn't matter what religion the president adopts, if any, but it's long since been settled that Obama is, in fact, Christian.

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"I'm Especially Proud When You're At Your Worst": A Letter To My Teenage Daughter

You're 15 years old now. You're not a little girl anymore—even though you wish you were, just a little bit.

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Homeless Woman Arrested For Stealing $32 Of Food From Wal-Mart

Drug addicted, homeless, and hungry don't add up to hilarity. Neither does the system that arrested this woman for stealing $32 worth of food in a country that throws away 263 millions pounds of food every day –– or a news cycle that chews up and spits out the needy for clicks and likes.

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School Includes Muslim Hymn in Holiday Program, Parents Lose Their Minds

ICYMI, there's a war against Christmas and nowhere is it fiercer than a Minnesota school that dared to include a Muslim hymn in its annual holiday concert. The rest of the program was dedicated to Christmas carols and Hanukkah songs, but many parents are up in arms that a lone Muslim song was included in the program.

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SHOCKER: Men And Women Experience Pain Differently

As you might imagine, assuming that men and women are exactly the same hasn't worked out too well.

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Mark Zuckerberg Announces The Birth Of His Baby –– And A Massive Charity

The pair has pledged to donate 99 percent of their Facebook shares over the course of their lifetime, which currently amount to about $45 billion. You know, just some pocket change.

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Cut it out with the pink ribbons.

6 Things You Can Do Today To Help Someone With Breast Cancer

As you've probably gathered by the explosion of pink everything, October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. And, while many people try to spread awareness with the best of intentions, there isn't anyone left on this planet who hasn't heard of breast cancer. Breast cancer patients need many things, but sharing silly Facebook statuses and engaging in other click-it-and-forget-about-it forms of awareness isn't one of them.

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