Eliana Osborn

I am going to have amazing posture. My neck will look so skinny just from the way I hold my head.

...But not in the way you'd think.

1. Borrow a child.

I, like far too many women in this country and the world, have had a wide variety of experiences involving sexual harassment.

I get how we want to make our kids successful and everything, right from the start. Feeding into the pressure, here’s the tagline from Starling’s company: “The world’s first word-tracking system that can improve your child’s trajectory for life.”

Help.

1. Write a damn letter.

When I’m staring at the wall trying to keep my cool when my 6-year-old is hysterical about the tiny bump on his finger, I attempt to channel some of the good parts.

A haircut is a whole lot cheaper than therapy or tattoos or a round-the-world plane ticket.

There are some days of parenting that are magical, full of unicorns and four leaf clovers and lottery winnings. Those are the moments when I catch myself, just for a second, feeling content and happy and looking around trying to freeze things. Out of 7000 days, those maybe make up five a year.