Eliana Osborn

I’m not there yet. But I need to be honest—I’m closer to 40 than any other multiple of five.

I wanted to write a book last summer. Then I realized what a terrible goal that was and modified accordingly.

I’m not alone in being troubled by how people suddenly disappear in life, right? That’s essentially why the internet was created. You may have heard rumors about Al Gore inventing it for military purposes... Lies!

My main reason for doing reading testing, enduring a bus ride to a field trip about weapons engineering, and other thrills? Stalking.

I cried every single day of my life until I was 18 years old. I did not know this was abnormal.

I am going to have amazing posture. My neck will look so skinny just from the way I hold my head.

Don’t listen to horror stories about airplane tantrums. Listen to me while I let you in on the secret perks of seeing the world with kiddos.

Sometimes the nicest kids turn into whole new people when they come over to your house.

Baranta is a new martial art focusing on traditional folk dancing and activities.

Really, you should thank me. I’m just protecting your future self.