Gigi Engle

The vagina is as magical and beautiful as a unicorn gallivanting through a sea of daisies on a warm spring day. Therefore, the vagina should be treated as a magical and beautiful creature: with care love and endless devotion.

Mastering cunnilingus is something all men should aspire to do. If you’re making any of these eight, monstrous cunnilingus mistakes, here is why they’re terrible and how to fix them. Hurray for happy vaginas!

I found that Yoni crystals can apparently put you at risk for toxic shock?!??! And I was like: WHAAAAAT?!?!!?!?

Having sex in public is exhilarating. But while the risk of being caught is compelling to many of us, getting busted will earn you a fat misdemeanor charge with up to three years in prison. The authorities are not screwing around on this — so keep this in mind before you release your inner exhibitionist and live life in your free-spirited way.

I have been in so many relationships that sucked. It had everything to do with me.

You guys have a lot of trouble dating these days, now that women have this silly notion in their marble-sized brains that they should maybe want to be treated like equals to you. HOW RIDICULOUS. EW! Luckily, you can work around these ideals. Women aren’t really smart enough to comprehend them anyway, you know?

There is no shame in being guarded. There is nothing wrong with it. You do not have to work tirelessly in therapy to break down your natural inclination towards self-preservation in order to find a romantic partner.

I spent much of my childhood fawning over episodes of Star Trek. It was always about Spock for me. Therefore, Star Trek shaped my love life.

Attention everyone: DIY sex toys are NOT a good idea. Here’s why.

Recognizing your own faults in relationships is hard. Here are some definitive signs you’re actually the problem in your relationship.