Jody Allard

ICYMI, Raven-Symone left pretty much everyone shaking their heads this morning when she

The thing about trauma is that it creates inherently unreliable witnesses. Victims tell as much as they can bear to tell, in that moment, and perhaps even as much as they can remember. Memories can be hazy and dim until the second that the curtain is lifted and the body is thrust back into the moment of abuse. There is no such thing as one way of processing trauma, and there is no perfectly linear path to recovery, either.

As you've probably gathered by the explosion of pink everything, October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month. And, while many people try to spread awareness with the best of intentions, there isn't anyone left on this planet who hasn't heard of breast cancer. Breast cancer patients need many things, but sharing silly Facebook statuses and engaging in other click-it-and-forget-about-it forms of awareness isn't one of them.

Let me repeat that, just in case you missed it. Bernie Sanders said that a mother "should stay home" with her baby. When I first heard that sentence, I looked at my teenagers, and began yelling, "Mothers?! Should?!" My oldest son, who is 17 now, shrugged and replied, "Well, they should stay home with their babies, right? I mean, isn't that a good thing?"

It's easy and painless to poke our noses into the minutiae of other parents' decisions, but it in no way tackles the real epidemic of child abuse.

". . . a couple of people posted the nastiest sex ad they could come up with to Craigslist and published all of the responses, including pictures, email addresses, etc. Unfortunately, my ex husband was dumb enough to use a fake email address but still send this "woman" multiple pictures of himself that included both his face and his dick. It was very obvious to everyone concerned that my husband was soliciting nasty sex online."

Once upon a time, a band of heavily-armed men decided to take over an Oregon federal building. Because they were white, the Feds didn't shoot them in 12 seconds, and nobody even really did anything about it. (Possibly also because these intrepid defenders of our Constitution decided to seize a bird sanctuary.)

You're 15 years old now. You're not a little girl anymore—even though you wish you were, just a little bit.

I wish that we inhabited the world Williams’ image depicts, where women can wear bodysuits and high heels and be considered powerful. But if I ventured into the comments I know what I would find: men saying they want to fuck her, women telling her to put some clothes on, and at least one thinly-veiled rape threat. She wants to be fucked, they will say, with her legs open and waiting. Her power and poise will become an invitation to overpower her.

It’s been three years since I divorced my mother. The reasons are long and complicated, yet also short and simple. My mother is not capable of mothering anyone, and I am healthier and happier without her.