Kristi Pahr

Life looks a lot different at 40 than it did at 25, and I have a whole new list of things to worry about. It's a very long list, and it makes me anxious on the best day, plain terrified on the worst day, and on a run-of-the-mill day, it just keeps reminding me that I'm clueless about what to think and what to do and how to be grown.

Things as simple as a missed call from an unknown number or someone knocking on your door put me into straight up fight or flight. I really do hide from people who come to my door. Real talk, I have gotten on my hands and knees below a window so they wouldn’t see me. I’ve even hidden in the closet. I know. Whacko.

I found my first gray hair when I was 12 years old. Twelve. I had gray hair before I had a period.

Once your doctor or midwife has cleared you for sex and you’re feeling ready to get back in the saddle, so to speak, there are a few things you’ll need to mentally prep yourself for.

I’m lazy as hell, you guys. I know it’s true and I’m not particularly ashamed.

I know how it feels to not contribute financially to the household. I know how it feels to be completely dependent on someone else for my financial stability. I know how it feels to know that if something dreadful and unthinkable happened, I’d be completely destitute. And it’s terrifying.

I think we can all agree that there is some messed up stuff happening right now.

My version of self-care is a little less “best life” and a little more “no life”, but it works for me.

I’ve been pregnant three times, and I have two beautiful, amazing, awe-inspiri

2016 sucked. If we can’t agree on anything else, I think we can all agree on at least that much.