Melissa Lovitz

Melissa Lovitz

Bio

Melissa Lovitz recently graduated from the University of Connecticut where she earned a B.A. in Human Development and Family Studies. She is currently a graduate student at Brown University studying Urban Education Policy with a focus on family and community engagement in urban communities. She loves country music, gymnastics, coffee, “Grey’s Anatomy,” popcorn and great conversations. You can read more of Melissa’s work at I’m Probably Overthinking This or follow her on Twitter @MelisLov.

Melissa Lovitz Articles

Let's demystify asexuality.

The Top 4 Questions I’m Asked When I Say I’m Asexual

3. Do you masturbate? First, what each person does with or to their body is nobody else’s business. Remember, asexuality is about sexual attraction not necessarily sexual desire or arousal. Simply put, most asexual people can experience sexual arousal; some asexuals masturbate and some do not.

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When my body didn’t fit socially-approved styles, cuts, and sizes, the obvious solution was to change my body rather than find clothes that complemented my physique.

Having Two Breast Reductions Didn't Make Me Happier

My relationship with body is anything but “typical.” So far, I’ve hated my body at every size — and not just because of my size.

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I forget, did I ask for anyone’s permission or opinion about whether or not I belong?

On Coming Out As Asexual

I don’t identify with the heterosexual norms that have been shoved down my throat and the pathologizing rhetoric that, for most of my life, shrieked "you’re broken," and then I was publicly ostracized by a person who identifies as part of "the community" — the same community I feel connected to.

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Rather than eating until I felt anxious that I was eating too much or wasting too much time, I ate when I was hungry and stopped when I was full. Image: Thinkstock.

3 Things That Changed When I Started Thinking Of Food As Fuel

Something changed for me when I heard my friend say, “I run so I can eat.” I run so I can cope, so I can feel invincible, so I can think. And so, in a surprising change of events, I challenged them politely and asked, “What would change if, instead, you ate so you can run?”

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Demisexuality isn't what you might think.

Demisexuality: The Common Sexual Orientation You Might Have But Not Know About

It’s frustrating that most identities on the asexuality spectrum are qualified by a “lack” of something — desire, intimacy, attraction. I wonder, what might happen for demisexual (or asexual) people if we turn our focus toward what relationships contain, rather than what they’re missing.

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Realizing I wasn’t alone provided me with the validation I needed to embrace my sexual orientation.

Asexual Awareness Week: What IS Asexuality Anyway?

So, if you’re out there in the world feeling broken, and questioning if you’re the only one who doesn’t “get it”, or if you’re eager to learn more about asexuality so you can be a better ally to the LGBTQIA+ community, here are three things that helped me claim and learn about my asexual identity.

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"5. Paying Attention To Nonverbal Communication"

5 Communication Strategies That Will Improve Your Relationships

Because it's true: Practice really does make perfect.

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Bullet journaling all about what works for you. It shouldn’t feel burdensome.

Bullet Journaling For Basic People With Lots Of Thoughts

The trick to successful bullet journaling, in my mind, is to avoid getting caught up in the fanciness of it! Of course, you can make your bullet journal as complex or minimalist as you want, but I’d recommend starting slow. Allow your bullet journaling practice to morph to your needs.

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Sometimes, I feel like I don’t measure up in the feminist or queer communities.

Am I A Bad Queer? Am I A Bad Feminist? 

I’ve been struggling to understand if I’m a “bad queer” or a “bad feminist” and sometimes, I think I am!

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Image Credit: Thinkstock

What's The Difference Between Aesthetic And Sexual Attraction?

Sexual attraction is not the only type of physical attraction, AND aesthetic attraction is not the same as sexual attraction!

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