Rebekah Kuschmider

Zika virus is not going anywhere.

Ah, the oh-so-common slippery slope idea. If same sex marriages are to be legal, why not other kinds of marriages? Why not polygamy or polyandry or marriage to animals or that lady who married a roller coaster?

Apparently, there is a type of wasp that deposits its larvae inside oak trees, where they grow inside the wood, nourished on oak bark and wasp poop. You can collect these wasp incubators — called oak galls — and do stuff with them. The Etsy seller says they’re good for all kinds of “traditional” medicinal uses like tightening the vagina and uterus after childbirth. THIS IS A BAD IDEA!

One hopes that the tweet was composed by a 19-year-old intern who thought it would make his frat buddies laugh when he goes back for the fall semester. One also hopes that an adult sent said intern packing the minute he clicked “tweet.”

I got a puppy last fall, and I’ve spent about a zillion dollars on different things for her to chew. She really likes bully sticks, which are dehydrated bull penises. It cracks me up every time I give one to her and say, “Here. Go eat a dick.”

We salute you, fidget spinner dog. You are a good boy.

So far, April is mainly just walking around and not giving birth, which is probably annoying to poor April. There’s nothing quite like the end of pregnancy, when you just want to be done with it and get to the part where you have a baby. Maybe it’s different for giraffes, but that’s sure how I felt when I was pregnant.

When I saw the trending hashtag #DemocraticWhores, I got really excited, thinking maybe Democrats were all strutting around today in those sensational boots Julia Roberts wore way back in Pretty Woman. Nancy Pelosi could rock those boots, don’t you think?

Paul Ryan and 216 other Republican representatives (but no Democrats, FYI) voted to pass the American Health Care Act (AHCA), which is an attempt to unmake everything that the Affordable Act (Obamacare, if you’re a nasty woman or bad hombre) did to make health insurance more accessible, more comprehensive, and less expensive.

The worlds of theme parks and virtual reality give us all kinds of opportunities to experience adventures that are out of the realm of possibility.