Rebekah Kuschmider

I know a woman who worked in an inner-city hospital before the passage of Roe v Wade. Every week, staff there saw women come in battling massive infection or blood loss. They actually reserved beds for women like this because it was so common. The cause? Illegal, unsafe abortions. But that was then, right? That was 42 years ago, right? That doesn’t happen anymore, right? Wrong.

The manatees were engaged in a little mutual oral pleasure — or, as the kids call it, 69. Way to go, manatees!

For those living in poverty, accessing menstrual supplies can be a true crisis. That’s why it’s so damn brilliant and compassionate that lawmakers New York City are proposing programs that will make menstrual supplies free and available in public schools, and homeless shelters.

You can’t deal either, can you? Of course you can’t. So listen: let’s stop talking about this scum-sucking-bottom-feeder and focus on something happy. Like a puppy finding a home and a job.

Like Gwyneth, I’m a mom of two kids, so I’m kind of hung up on the fact that she has the time to take a whole bath every night. I usually only manage to squeeze in a prison shower after the kids are in bed and before I collapse, so this brush-and-bathe routine is really amazing to me.

There is literally zero precedent for foreign influence on elections in the US — at least to this degree — and no one seems to know what to do with the information.

Is it because whoopee is more fun when there’s less chance that your orgasm will result in a diaper blow-out 40 weeks later?

If you happen to be on the University of Texas, Austin campus on Wednesday, August 24th, be prepared to rock out with your cock out. Well, your dildo out.

Hey, guys! Remember a few months ago when I predicted that Hillary Clinton’s email troubles wouldn’t land her in prison? Well, I was totally right!

Today we have kind of a head scratcher of a story out of Austin, Texas.