Rebekah Kuschmider

Born Prince Rogers Nelson in Minneapolis, Minnesota, the singer was known for… Jesus, fucking everything.

I was all set to write a lighthearted piece here about KFC’s new line of flavored nail polish. Yes, you did read that right. KFC has a line of nail polishes that come in “original recipe” and “hot and spicy” and they would LITERALLY make your nails finger lickin’ good. I mean OMG! Sadly, they’re only available in Hong Kong.

In my travels around the internet today, I happened upon an article about something Mike Rowe, dirty job expert

“And I saw something wrapped around her, so I ran up and punched it in the side of the head,” Gibbs told the CBC. “At that point, I realized it was a cougar.”

As if you needed another reason to love England’s Prince William, he just became the first member of the Royal Family to appear on the cover of an LGBT publication!

In the midst of this firestorm was poor Rachael Ray, who has never been linked to JayZ in any way. The only thing she did was have a name similar to Rachel Roy, so she’s feeling the sting. Lemons and bees keep appearing in her comments sections. Hopefully, her signature humor will rule the day and she’ll invent a lemon-honey dessert called Becky Bars to show us she’s not mad.

Back in the old days, before the Internet was in our pockets, finding a vacation rental involved travel agents. Finding a vacation rental equipped with kinky sex equipment...Well, I don’t know how that would have worked. Luckily for all the fetishists out there, those dark days are behind us.

Yesterday, former New York Mayor and billionaire Michael Bloomberg announced he will not mount a third party bid for the White House.

I am not sure the human race is really good enough to deserve dogs.