Rebekah Kuschmider

The good news for those of us in the cicada zones: they’ll only be around for a couple more weeks. Cicadas are dramatic additions to any ecosystem, but they don't hang around long on the surface.

You can’t deal either, can you? Of course you can’t. So listen: let’s stop talking about this scum-sucking-bottom-feeder and focus on something happy. Like a puppy finding a home and a job.

To see a performer — a male performer, at that — stand up and call out groping like that? I want to scream "F*CK YEAH!" and buy that guy a drink after the show.

You should teach your kids what to do if they encounter a gun, but we as adults should do what we can to prevent that from happening in the first place. One group of adults who can be especially helpful on that front is pediatricians. Some of them are hoping to be part of an effort to reduce gun accidents by talking to parents about gun safety.

Given the current gulf between the two candidates in terms of primaries and delegates won, it’s pretty safe to say that we’re looking at a Trump nomination.

What’s going on is that Gen. Michael Flynn, one-time general, disgraced former head of the Defense Intelligence Agency, Trump campaign advisor and - very briefly - Trump National Security Advisor resigned last night. Why did he resign?

We interrupt this dumpster fire that is the United States of America in 2017 to bring you what is probably the most horrifying news in the history

Apparently, there is a type of wasp that deposits its larvae inside oak trees, where they grow inside the wood, nourished on oak bark and wasp poop. You can collect these wasp incubators — called oak galls — and do stuff with them. The Etsy seller says they’re good for all kinds of “traditional” medicinal uses like tightening the vagina and uterus after childbirth. THIS IS A BAD IDEA!

Dr. Gunter has lots of medical reasons why one should not do this (as well as a stomach-turning description of a “retained tampon” removal, so be warned). I have a lay-person’s response: OMG DON’T DO THAT TO YOUR PERFECTLY GOOD VAGINA!

Heels hurt. They just do. But there may be hope, yet.