Cynthia Lawrence

Before we’ve even had time to digest the festive season (and the last of the mulled wine), the overwhelming abundance of red hearts, teddy bears, and all things contrived come out to taunt us. They’re everywhere. From the zillion greeting cards, custom chocolates, gift ideas, sex toys, you name it — all in the name of a dude called Cupid.

"1. The staff at all four branches of Starbucks around your office know you on a first name basis, and have your “usual” ready for you the minute you arrive."

2. Searching for an anti-allergen birthday cake. Back in the day, there was only one birthday cake (usually homemade). All the kids would eat it problem-free, and the only emergency would be little Jack vomiting on a chair. But with today’s abundance of nut, gluten, wheat, egg and you-name-it allergies, vomiting is the least of your worries. Now, your mission is to find a cake (or several) that will not require antihistamines afterwards.

The "Mega-Mouth" Mom: You’ll usually be able to hear her before you can see her. Not one to be discreet in her conversations, the whole playground usually knows of her business (and other people’s).

"So what happens when the split is acrimonious and your friends end up dumping you, too? Suddenly you’re treated as an outcast, and when you bump into them in the street, they pretend they haven’t seen you, even when you’re standing in the next line in Costco!"

Now, I’m no qualified medic, but surely this was no coincidence.

"When is there going to be baby number two?" It's a familiar question to those who opt to have an only child. But it's no one else's business whether or not I have another child.

2. We are not used to sharing. Growing up, I was aware of how fortunate I was. I had my own bedroom with my own things, and the added bonus of knowing that all the gifts under the Christmas tree were all mine! So the concept of sharing my space or possessions was a big deal.

You suddenly spot someone from across the room, on a train to work, or a gas station, and your heart instantly skips a beat, palms get sweaty and you just know that person is ‘the one’, (without even muttering a word to them.) Rubbish! You simply fancy the pants off that person and know they are “the one” who you wouldn’t mind taking to bed in a hurry! Lust is the basis for instant physical attraction, not love

1. Don’t go wild at the free bar — Yes it’s a party, you’re having fun and the drinks are overflowing but that’s no excuse to get ridiculously drunk. You probably won’t even realize your glass being constantly refilled, so pace yourself!