5 (Silly) Ways to Celebrate Oregon Legalizing Gay Marriage

Today, a federal judge overturned the ban on same-sex marriage up in the, "She Flies With Her Own Wings" state.  That's right folks, gay marriage is legal in Oregon! Woohoo! Turns out, Oregon had a voter approved ban on gay people tying the knot. Today, a federal judge declared this unconstitutional.

Why does this keep happening? It's not the voter's decision to take away the rights of a targeted group. Remember the Jim Crow Laws? The Chinese Exclusion Act? Um, slavery?! There's a reason they call same-sex marriage a human rights issue! But enough of this frown and fist-making history—let's celebrate love in purely Oregonian ways today!

1. Binge-watch Portlandia
In case you've been avoiding all the hype, don't. This satirical show takes viewers all over Portland, Oregon and takes aim at just about every kind of couple on earth: gay, mismatched, old and boring, punk, hippie, you-name-it, they poke it.

2. Eat hazelnuts. 
They're the state nut of OregonBut Giana, my state doesn't have a nut! Damn right it doesn't—only Oregon is cool enough to have one! Hazelnuts are also good for your heart. (We won't tell if you get your fill from Nutella instead.)

3. Love your ladybits.
The Oregon flag has a beaver on the reverse side. Get it? But Giana—shut up, your state flag doesn't have a reverse side. Just. Oregon. Ugh, can we move already?

4. Spread some love! 
Oregon's birthday is February 14th, which happens to be Valentine's Day! Coincidence? I think not. How fitting for today. (Bonus points if you have leftover chocolate from the holiday of love in your freezer right now that you can start noshing.)

5. Get cray with the Venus Fly Trap position.
Did you know that Oregon houses the largest (single species) carnivorous plant reservation? Yup! It's called Darlingtonia State Natural Site and it's home to, you guessed it, the Darlingtonia. These hungry 'lil plants eat flies and other little bugs, much like the Venus Fly Trap. Yuck. Since there's no sex position called "the Darlingtonia," you'll have to stick to the Venus Fly Trap. Grab another lady and a guy. Man lies down—so lazy—and the women sit on either side of his hips and "trap" his johnson with their bodies. Don't have a harem of sexy friends willing to ravage each other? Neither do we (sigh). Maybe this one's for the spank bank.

Image: Awww, how happy. Courtesy of, ThinkStock 

If you like this article, please share it! Your clicks keep us alive!