Allison Cooper

I've noticed that some moms include some pretty wild descriptors on their Twitter profiles. While some are out-there and some are just plain boring, reading them has left me scratching my head, wondering that they would waste their 140 characters on these terms.

I’m not going to lie or sugarcoat my feelings right now — I’m nervous about going from a mom of one to a mom of two. My son is seven, so he, my husband, and I have had seven years of time as “just the three of us.”

There used to be weekends where I would rise and have no plans for the day but to do whatever the heck I wanted. I relied on no one and no one relied on me. Yes, there are aspects of those days that I miss (especially the sleeping in), but being a mom has made me a better person and my life much more purposeful. Would I love a do-over of a weekend sans kids? Sure! But as far as my character goes, nothing can compare to the way being a mom has humbled me.

10. 15 minutes alone in the grocery store has become your equivalent to a therapy session.

Faux freckles. Come on. You know that you have always wanted to strategically place a little freckle and mimic what Cindy Crawford has naturally.

Clear the country bumpkin idea out of your head, because that’s not what I’m referring to here. A great plaid button down shirt can be just what you need to update your wardrobe this fall.

This little, strong-willed, giggly baby girl is attached to me in every single way imaginable. It’s gotten so bad that any time I know I need to step out of the house, I feel myself worrying about it all day long up until the very moment I leave, because I know how bad her reaction is going to be.

"The whining is getting annoying. Yes, I said it and you read correctly. It’s annoying to hear you repeat the same thing over and over about yourself, whining about how you need to change your eating habits, work out more, and hire a new trainer. Calm yourself and move forward with your life . . ."

There is nothing in the world that quite compares to the joyous feeling of bringing a new baby home.

There is nothing worse than feeling guilt in the evening whenever you think about what you consumed during the day — it’s such a sucky feeling. I try to blame it on how busy I am, since it’s not my fault that all the easy to reach for food are often the ones I shouldn’t be grabbing.