Denarii Monroe

Bio

Denarii (rhymes with “canary”) is an aspiring screenwriter, freelance writer, and a weirdo. She's a Rutgers University alum and a two-year Pace University dropout; she studied English and Adolescent Education, respectively. She's written for BlogHer, Black Girl Dangerous, and Everyday Feminism. Follow her on Facebook, find her on Twitter and Instagram ([at]writersdelite). Mad selfies, pictures of her dog named Dog, raving about Matthew Gray Gubler, and ranting (or retweeting) about the writing process and racist, ableist, classist, fat-antagonistic heteropatriachary. She loves Buffy the Vampire Slayer, as well as soul food, red wine, cooking and baking, and the blues. Hanson is her favorite band ever (yes, that Hanson).

Denarii Monroe Articles

Over the years... I’ve realized that my father’s sentiments echo those of the judge, the father, and the rapist. Image: Thinkstock.

The Stanford Rape Case, My Father, And Collective Forgiveness

Much has already been said about the way the Stanford swimmer's privilege has insulated him from consequence, about the ever-pervasive victim blaming in public discourse, and about the inadequacy of the criminal justice system. But in so many of these conversations, in our rage against the rape culture machine, we forget the survivors — the most important people in the fight against sexual violence.

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It can be hard to understand how to support people in general, let alone those who seem to be struggling. Image: Thinkstock.

Tough Love: Not Always A Great Way To Help People Succeed

Some people will need more scaffolding to tackle their problems. Others, like some plants, are best left mostly alone and will eventually flourish on their own. You have to gauge a person’s needs and meet them where they are.

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With almost a decade of various kinds of activism under my belt, I am more than familiar with the important work that Planned Parenthood does.

I Visited Planned Parenthood For The First Time At Age 29

It had never occurred to me to visit [a Planned Parenthood].... And yet, in a culture where the rights and healthcare needs of people assigned female at birth are constantly under attack, it’s easy, even for someone like me, to have warped ideas about exactly what one will experience.

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 There’s a certain irony to it, in my experience, since this means we are constantly bombarded with “how to get over” that ex, but aren’t really guided — by family, social circles and other institutions, or media — on how to deal with “getting over” a friendship.

Friend Breakups Can Hurt As Much As Romantic Breakups

In a culture focused on the importance and superiority of romantic attraction and relationships — a culture aromantics might call alloromantic-centric — platonic friendships (another form of relationship) are consistently undervalued.

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Boundaries are key to healthy relationships (Image Credit: Thinkstock)

Struggling With Personal Boundaries? Check Out Our 'How To' Guide

You can create boundaries for many things. For example, your communication needs (what works for you, what others need to know, what you can’t tolerate, etc.), your limits in the bedroom, or even when your employer or employee is allowed to call or text you. They can be established for romantic, familial, platonic, and professional relationships.

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The reality is that we think, act, and experience and see the world differently. Image: WOCinTech Chat.

Writing Culture Has An Ableism Problem

As storytellers, disabled writers have thousands of stories inside of us, some related to our disabilities and some not. Some of us are lucky enough to have some sort of outlet for our words — in public and/or private spaces — while others still struggle to find the voice that lives within.

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"I had to learn how to properly and safely detangle kinky-curly hair. I had to be patient in the process of discovering what my hair liked and needed — and what it didn't." Image: Thinkstock.

Having Very Curly Hair Is Challenging, But Not For The Reasons You'd Expect

I had to learn me because I was never given a chance to. People often act like this is easy or shouldn't be hard to grasp, but when you've literally spent your entire life not even knowing what your real hair feels like, it takes time to get used to that, especially when you have no one and nowhere to go to for solid advice.

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I love you. Image: Llywelyn Nys/Unsplash.

On Activism: An Open Letter To My Peoples

And when you're multiply marginalized and know how much work there is to be done in the struggle for liberation, how few people are doing it, and that our lives literally depend on it, it can feel like you’re letting your people down.

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"I spent quite a few of my preteen and early teen years enjoying taking pictures. But because of the combination of racism, fat antagonism, and lookism, I wasn’t always comfortable getting in front of the camera." Image: Thinkstock

The Right To Be Ugly: How Lookism Affects My Ability To Be Carefree

[W]hy must the acknowledgment of my beauty be predicated on how well and how often I contort to attempt to fit into some kind of ideal? Why can’t I be all the iterations of me and still be beautiful?

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Image Credit: Tanner Vines via Unsplash

I'm Not Giving Up On My Dreams, And Neither Should You

I did not leave that theater the same way I arrived. It was then, as I walked back to my building and looked up at the night sky, that I knew. I thought to myself, “I want to make movies.”

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