Eliana Osborn

I look tired when I stay up too late. I also look tired if I get eight hours of sleep.

I, like far too many women in this country and the world, have had a wide variety of experiences involving sexual harassment.

Now that I’m a mother, I’m much more sympathetic to a woman who just couldn’t take it anymore. Not saying I’d leave my kids in a parking lot and hope for the best . . . just saying that I can understand the impulse.

We take weekend turns. He does vacations and summers. Literally. He takes them away. It is great.

Really, you should thank me. I’m just protecting your future self.

I’m terrified of wrongful imprisonment. To be the only one who knows the truth and have to live every day in a cell, wondering, why, god, why? [...] Sitting hooked up for gadgets to monitor every aspect of my mind and body, in a small room without any distraction, I see how a person could lose herself — or the truth — for a moment.

Your partner will make you want to throw up at some point. Pure, unadulterated disgust.

There are some days of parenting that are magical, full of unicorns and four leaf clovers and lottery winnings. Those are the moments when I catch myself, just for a second, feeling content and happy and looking around trying to freeze things. Out of 7000 days, those maybe make up five a year.

My sister Liz is full of wisdom, like my favorite quote I’ve shared with practically everyone I know: “Every pair of underwear has two good sides.”

I’m not broken by this therapy failure. Jane wasn't the person to help me at this point of my life. Someone else WILL be.