Gemma Hartley

Gemma Hartley

Bio

Gemma Hartley is a freelance writer with a BA in writing from The University of Nevada, Reno. She is author of FED UP: Emotional Labor, Women and The Way Forward. She lives in Reno with her husband, three young kids, an awesome dog, and a terrible cat.

Gemma Hartley Articles

The real reason I’m worried about sending my kids to school is that I’m going to be alone.

All Of My Kids Are In School & I Don't Know How To Be Alone

The real reason I’m worried about sending my kids to school is that I’m going to be alone. For the first time in nearly a decade. And that’s scary.

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I want my daughter to explore her interests and invest in herself.

I Don't Want My Daughter To Grow Up Like Me

Fortunately, when I look back at my childhood, it was mostly happy. I had parents who loved me. I had plenty of friends. I had access to food and shelter and education and more. Yet even with all my privilege, I don't want my daughter to have the same adolescence as me.

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What’s in a name? I don’t really know. Sometimes nothing. Sometimes everything. Image: NBC.

David Sedaris Named The Baby I Miscarried

It wasn’t the name I would have picked — not originally, at least — but as days turned into weeks, it grew on me.

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I had never had a problem with loving myself, until now. (Image: Thinkstock)

I Am Body Positive, Just Not When It Comes To Myself

But I was yet to face the cold, hard fact that my lack of acceptance for my own body, was really a lack of acceptance for all the bodies I had falsely embraced for so long. Could I really love someone else’s ample stomach, when I could not love my own?

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The occasional drink helped keep my stress levels low — and ultimately it contributed to a healthier pregnancy for me. Image: WeHeartIt.

Why I Drank While I Was Pregnant

I went on to drink a small glass of wine or two per week throughout my pregnancy once I got over the initial shock of it being unplanned. Once I had adjusted to the fact that I was going to bring another baby into the world, I was still overwhelmed by the stress it brought on. I had suffered from postpartum depression after the birth of my son and we had decided not to have any more children. I didn't want the risks or the horrible anxiety that came with pregnancy. Yet here I was, facing all that uncertainty again. Damn right I needed a drink.

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The money is great, but it is not the best part of becoming a working mom by far.

How Being A Working Mom Has Changed My Marriage

The money is great, but it is not the best part of becoming a working mom. Having my own career has shifted the power balance of my relationship.

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I wish I had someone to tell me that sometimes surviving motherhood is enough.

Sometimes Surviving Motherhood Is Enough

I’m not saying there is no joy to motherhood. I go through periods where I do feel like I’m at my parenting best. There are times when I’m overwhelmed with gratitude for the amazing life and children I’ve been given. It can be so, so good. But what I’m saying is, it doesn’t always have to feel like that.

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Third Child Party Favors: My favor to you was providing booze and grilled meats. Image: Thinkstock.

To My Third Son On His First Birthday: I'm Sorry

My first child’s milestones were elaborately marked, photographed, and celebrated with much fanfare... My third child however? Not so much. His first birthday was a much quieter affair — if it could be called an affair at all.

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 I want 2017 to be a year I spend actively fighting, instead of allowing myself to become complacent once the excitement of the election subsides.

3 New Year's Resolutions For Our First Year Of A Trump Presidency 

I could very easily slip through the next four years with blinders on and feel largely unaffected by the political climate. Which is why it’s so important for me to remind myself every day to stay in the fight. Even when it doesn't affect me personally, I owe it to my allies to remain vigilant all (four) year(s) long.

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Example A: So while I would love to help bring my unique voice to your publication, unless you decide to start paying in actual real-world money, I will have to instead offer you a sincere f*ck no.

How To Craft A Tactful 'F*ck No'

You are a professional. You want to handle your business with a certain air of sophistication. You want to tell them "f*ck no," but want to do so graciously, tactfully — you are, after all, a wordsmith.

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