Kate Ryan

12:48 AM. Why would someone schedule an exorcism for the middle of a weeknight?

For the record, I didn’t mean to be born so tall. I didn’t ask for bulky shoulders or a head that doesn’t fit most hats.

Hollywood continues to flounder in a dick-sucking frenzy of self-congratulatory white male directors, writers, and producers.

One of my biggest fears is having a random stranger ask me, "how it’s going?" They might as well ask if I’d like to step into their van and get murdered.

I would send some chocolates, but I’m not allowed anymore since they found the shiv in the birthday cake I sent you.

"No self-respecting journalist or publication would ever hire someone who employs the word 'sh--' as a title for anything."

At Monster High, Jimmy Werewolf gets another demerit for forgetting to shave again.

My tights are cutting me in half at the waist . . . just like a sausage in its casing.

His mind rode the lines, circling on an endless loop to nowhere as he attempted to go about his activities.

The birds abandon their posts in the pepper trees, sending tiny, oblong leaves raining to the ground.