Pumpkin Spice Lattes Are Back and It's Officially Pumpkin Everything Season

ICYMI, today marks the first official day of the seasonal return of the Starbucks pumpkin spice latte. Of course, if you're truly obsessed you probably already know that AND got one when it was first made available last week for "special" customers, but either way, today's the day. Pumpkin lovers rejoice!

This year, Starbucks decided to shake things up a bit by actually adding pumpkin to the ingredients list. I know, I know, that's crazy talk –– but it's true. This year, for the very first time, your PSL will contain actual pumpkin instead of pumpkin-flavored chemicals. I took an informal poll of my pumpkin-loving friends (read: not me), and they all said that this year's pumpkin-containing version tastes exactly the same as every other year's PSL. Bummer. But, on the plus side, you won't have to endure another Food Babe campaign against the chemicals in your PSL that were definitely going to give you cancer. 

In case the PSL alone won't satisfy your need for pumpkin everything, marketers have your back. Basically, you can now coat yourself in pumpkin from head to toe, inside and out, all in the name of that magical fall flavor. Pumpkin Oreos, yogurt, cookies, cereals, body washes, and even toothpaste exist to ensure that you do not waste even a moment of pumpkin season by sullying your palate with decidedly non-pumpkin flavors like chocolate or mint. Ain't nobody got time for that. 

What I want to know is where is my pumpkin toilet paper? Until I can wipe my ass with pumpkin, America simply isn't fulfilling its promise to me.

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