Britni de la Cretaz

Britni de la Cretaz

Bio

Britni de la Cretaz is a feminist mama, recovered alcoholic, and community organizer in Boston, MA. She's a founding member of Safe Hub Collective. You can find her on Twitter at @britnidlc.

Britni de la Cretaz Articles

It's the truth.

Why I'm Proud My Child Showed Her Doctor Her Vulva

Studies have shown that teaching kids the actual terms for their private parts — instead of cutesy nicknames — decreases their chances of being targeted by a sexual predator. Their words are their weapon, whether they know it or not.

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Pregnant = steamy dreams?

Do You Have Vivid Sex Dreams When You're Pregnant? ME TOO

The sex dreams that have caught me completely off-guard. I don’t generally have much of a sex drive during my pregnancy when I’m awake, but when I’m asleep, it’s a completely different story. I have these incredibly vivid, incredibly-detailed sex dreams almost every night. Often, they involve celebrities.

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How To Be An Activist And A Mom

Being both a mother and an activist can be tricky sometimes. Often, they seem to be at odds with each other. I can’t drop everything to show up for a protest, or meeting, because I have to find childcare, and my kid goes to bed at 6:30 PM. I have to consider my child’s safety when I make the decision to engage in a protest, or a direct action, even if she isn’t in attendance with me.

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I Changed My Name When I Got Married...But I Didn't Take His

Women have changed their last names from their father’s to their new husband’s — a tradition that used to symbolize the transfer of “property” from one man to another. That property, of course, was the virgin bride. Many people will argue that it no longer has that implication, but for me, as a feminist, partaking in a tradition that is so rooted in the literal oppression of women is something that left an incredibly bad taste in my mouth.

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Don't presume heterosexuality. Image: Thinkstock.

On Parenting And Compulsory Heterosexuality

I want my child to be able to self-determine. What that means to me is that they know they have options besides the “default” one that’s plastered all over their TV screens, and that they always know that.

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Why I Would Never Circumcise My Son

When my husband and I looked at the screen in the ultrasound room and saw that we were having a girl, we both breathed a sigh of relief. Not because we didn’t want to have a boy, but because it meant the circumcision debate was off the table.

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Misogyny is real.

All The Misogynists I've Dated

Being attracted to your oppressor is hard. It means that the people you want to date (or fuck) are also people who contribute to your marginalization, who have privilege that you don't, and who, more often than not, have internalized some pretty gross ideas about you.

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Things You Need To Know About Becoming Sober As A Trauma Survivor

“My name is Britni, and I’m an alcoholic.” I’ve said those words more times than I can count and they’re always met with nods of recognition and assurances of “me too.” I’m also a survivor of rape and sexual assault, and it’s a big part of my addiction story.

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Seven Years After The Abuse, And Triggers Still Remain

It’s been seven years since I left him. Most days he doesn’t cross my mind. I forget that he existed. The things that he put me through are filed away somewhere that never gets opened. I’ve done the work of understanding what I went through, of forgiving him for the abuse, of moving on with my life.

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