Gemma Hartley

Gemma Hartley

Bio

Gemma Hartley is a freelance writer with a BA in writing from The University of Nevada, Reno. She is author of FED UP: Emotional Labor, Women and The Way Forward. She lives in Reno with her husband, three young kids, an awesome dog, and a terrible cat.

Gemma Hartley Articles

I felt a strong need to rise to challenges, because I knew that my dad would expect nothing less from me. Image: Thinkstock.

My Dad Wouldn't Call Himself A Feminist, But I Would.

“Feminism” wasn’t a word I heard much growing up. When I did hear it, I equated it with a historical event, not a work in progress. I thought first-wave feminism was a one-and-done deal, and that all the work necessary for women’s equality had already been accomplished.

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Example A: So while I would love to help bring my unique voice to your publication, unless you decide to start paying in actual real-world money, I will have to instead offer you a sincere f*ck no.

How To Craft A Tactful 'F*ck No'

You are a professional. You want to handle your business with a certain air of sophistication. You want to tell them "f*ck no," but want to do so graciously, tactfully — you are, after all, a wordsmith.

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I wasn’t simply an accessory to misogynistic behavior — I was actively participating in it. Image: Thinkstock.

'One Of The Guys': On Cool Girls And Internalized Misogyny

I felt unique in my passion for martial arts, my affinity for Call of Duty, my go-with-the-flow attitude toward boyish adventures. I wanted to be “one of the guys,” while still retaining the distinction of my sexuality. I longed to be the quintessential cool girl — desirable yet approachable. But in retrospect, all that really amounted to internalized misogyny.

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I wish I had realized there was no such thing as being too young to have mental health issues.

I Thought I Was "Too Young" For Mental Health Problems

I wish I had realized there was no such thing as being too young to have mental health issues. That there was nothing shameful about postpartum struggles.

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I wish that people understood that it’s never OK to comment on a mother’s age — young or old. Because the judgmental connotation is always there, no matter how innocent the intent.

Is It Ever Okay To Comment On A Mother's Age?

The insecurities about my age pushed me over the edge, making me work myself to the bone trying to be what I thought society would deem as a “good mom.” So I wish people understood that it’s never OK to comment on a mother’s age — young or old. Because the judgmental connotation is always there, no matter how innocent the intent.

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 I want 2017 to be a year I spend actively fighting, instead of allowing myself to become complacent once the excitement of the election subsides.

3 New Year's Resolutions For Our First Year Of A Trump Presidency 

I could very easily slip through the next four years with blinders on and feel largely unaffected by the political climate. Which is why it’s so important for me to remind myself every day to stay in the fight. Even when it doesn't affect me personally, I owe it to my allies to remain vigilant all (four) year(s) long.

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The point is, if you feel like you're sucking at the back-to-school transition, take heart. I am out here doing way way worse.

It's Only The 2nd Week Of School & I'm Already Falling Apart

Clearly, it does not take long for my over-ambition to turn me from a vision of perfection into a train wreck you can't look away from. Behold, my first week of school splendor, versus my second week of school ineptitude.

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I want to live my best life and, honestly, it's exhausting.

The Endless Quest To 'Live My Best Life:' Honestly, It's Just Exhausting

I want to live my best life and, honestly, it's exhausting. Sometimes I wish I could just take a break and say I'm content with where I'm at.

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Ignoring rules to just get on with it already doesn't work out so well when they get older... (Image Credit: Unsplash/Zivile& Arunas)

I Wish I Had Never 'Let' My Kid Win

When my son was little, I used to let him win board games a lot.

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(Image: publicdomainpictures.net)

The Reasons Why I Don't Want My Son To Learn To Read

I know it won't be long until he can read the headlines before I can bury the truth. He will learn to read, and then to suffer. Words will haunt him.

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