Gigi Engle

You can’t change a fuckboy.

Here’s the absolute truth: you cannot change a fuckboy unless he wants to change by himself. This is where girls get messed up. They think that a guy is going to change his crappy behavior for HER. This is not the case 99.9% of the time. If he’s a fuckboy, he’s not ready to stop being one. It doesn’t matter how great you are or how much you love him. Trust me.

He has to make that decision for himself.

Having sex in public is exhilarating. But while the risk of being caught is compelling to many of us, getting busted will earn you a fat misdemeanor charge with up to three years in prison. The authorities are not screwing around on this — so keep this in mind before you release your inner exhibitionist and live life in your free-spirited way.

You guys have a lot of trouble dating these days, now that women have this silly notion in their marble-sized brains that they should maybe want to be treated like equals to you. HOW RIDICULOUS. EW! Luckily, you can work around these ideals. Women aren’t really smart enough to comprehend them anyway, you know?

There is no shame in being guarded. There is nothing wrong with it. You do not have to work tirelessly in therapy to break down your natural inclination towards self-preservation in order to find a romantic partner.

Finding love actually doesn’t begin when you find the right person. It begins when you love yourself. Being single may be scary and all, but it’s going to help you find “the one” faster than jumping from person to person. If you don’t know how to stand on your own, how can you expect to know what a partnership looks like?

It is a strange thing to find oneself at the tentative intersection of being female, sex positive, and in a long-term, monogamous relationship.

Sex is amazing, but let’s address the giant pink, dildo in the room: while sex IS super fun, sex is also exhausting. It’s an entire workout in itself.

Let’s be real, friends. All sex positions are not created equal. Sex is amazing and fun, but there are certain sexual situations and moves that are better than others.

In order to develop a healthy relationship, you’ve got to give a little to get a little. Oral sex is all about giving.

I’m talking about nagging. Men MUST stop using this word! Here's why.