Jess Lahitou

That headline is a bit of false advertising, as I am in not quite qualified to proclaim myself a “Thanksgiving Pro.”

A few weeks ago, I thought we might actually celebrate the end of the 2016 election.

Throughout this long and increasingly nightmarish primary season, an argument emerged from Republican candidates who were routinely getting their butts handed to them by Donald Trump.

Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump won big in yesterday’s New York Primary contests.

Democrats need to nominate the person with the best chance of cleaning the floor with Donald Trump. Not just for their own victory, but for the… dare I say, survival of the country itself.

Let’s break this down for Spicer.

All this means that, for the first time since 1992, a third-party candidate has a very strong chance of impacting election results. And if something truly wild were to happen (say, no candidate broke the 270-electoral vote mark needed to win the presidency), then there’s an outside chance that a third-party could actually win the White House.

That’s what Syria is — our morally bankrupt foreign policy, impossible to escape, impossible to fix.

The most recent issue of Time features a cover with twenty-one shadowed question marks scattered under the headline: “Is Monogamy Over?”

There were two stories that emerged from last night’s Republican debate: 1. The matchup between Ted Cruz and Marco Rubio, arguing over immigration policy and foreign policy (Cruz: no amnesty, build a wall, bomb ISIS while somehow not harming innocents. Rubio: eventual legalization of illegal immigrants, strengthen borders, work with Arab partners to defeat ISIS, more troops).