Jody Allard

Gwyneth's attempt to eat on a food stamp budget failed to take into account the reality of living in poverty.

Obama outlined his new gun control plan this morning and all I have to say is thanks, Obama. It's about goddamn time.

ICYMI, Steve Harvey became the butt of everyone's jokes when he announced the wrong winner of last night's 2015 Miss Universe Pageant. Harvey mistakenly announced that Miss Colombia, the first runner up, had won the pageant instead of the actual winner, Miss Phillipines.

If you don't know who the Holderness family is and have somehow managed to miss their series of painfully awkward viral videos, congratulations! You haven't missed much.

9. Use Timeouts—For Yourself!

". . . it is illegal to sell fetal tissue, but it is perfectly legal to receive compensation for the time and expense involved in collecting, preparing, storing, and transporting tissue for research purposes. This is well-established in the rules and regulations surrounding organ and tissue donation. Similar regulations also make it illegal to sell children, but legal to compensate parents for medical care and expenses incurred during an adoption."

The more I told him that something hurt me, the more that he did it.

Before you run to the bathroom to puke out your human DNA containing hot dog while sobbing over delicious bacon, let me clear up a few misconceptions.

Delivering gifts to children around the globe in a single night might seem like a tall order for one man, but when children were asked whether a woman could do Santa Claus' job, a passel of adorable British kids had a decidedly ugly answer –– a resounding no.

As a former English lit major and long-time editor, I've met my share of linguistics pedants. Today is not their day. But for everyone else who appreciates the natural evolution of language, rejoice! Singular "they" was just named 2015's Word of the Year.