Melissa A. Fabello

Melissa A. Fabello

Bio

Melissa A. Fabello is a sexuality educator, body image and eating disorder activist, and media literacy vlogger based out of Philadelphia. She currently works as a Managing Editor of Everyday Feminism and is a PhD candidate in Human Sexuality Studies. Follow her on Twitter @fyeahmfabello.

Melissa A. Fabello Articles

Thanksgiving ain't easy.

3 Tips For Surviving Thanksgiving When You Struggle With An Eating Disorder

I’m a big proponent of teaching our loved ones how, during the holidays, to be gentle with our eating disorders (both in recovery and out).

Read...

Navigating Breast Insecurities: Big, Small, Lopsided, They Are All Good.

". . . guess what! Despite, again, what the media tells you, breasts come in a huge variety of shapes! Most natural breasts are affected by gravity and seem to sag a little bit, rather than perking up like they might in a bra. Most nipples fall downward (so, ya know, potential babies can reach them), rather than face forward."

Read...
Taylor Swift Fearless Tour 03 by WEZL

Taylor Swift And White Feminism

And as much as I’m a Swifty, I’m a feminist first (a white one, by the way, at that), and I’m not here for any kind of feminism that would excuse, for instance, Taylor’s misunderstanding that race is irrelevant in pop culture politics (a la the feud with Nicki Minaj that never was).

Read...
It's about the shit culture that we live in — one in which sexuality education comes mostly from mainstream pornography and locker room talks, and where disrespect for and objectification of women runs rampant. Image: thinkstock.com

20 Things Guys Have Actually Said To Me In Bed

In my experience dating and sleeping with straight, cisgender dudes who worship hegemonic masculinity, I’ve noticed that there’s something really — umm — special about how they go about sexuality.

Read...

6 Things About Eating Disorders That You Probably Actually Really Don’t Know

"A common response that folks struggling with eating disorders hear is something along the lines of “Just eat,” “Just stop purging,” or “Just stop overeating.” And that’s akin to telling someone with depression to “Cheer up” or someone with anxiety to “Calm down.” That is: It’s not effective. At all. It’s actually kind of offensive."

Read...
long distance love . . . it's possible.

Long Distance Dates: How To Date Your Partner 3,000 Miles Away

Another awesome idea, whether the relationship is new or established, is to look at a sexual inventory checklist (like this one). The list goes through different sexual situations that are important to discuss with a partner – from body boundaries to birth control and safer sex options to what you’ve done, what you’d like to try, and what’s a big “no” for you. It’s a great, less-awkward avenue to talking about sex in a big way and to understand one another’s needs more intimately.

Read...
50 Resolutions.

50 Body Acceptance New Year Resolutions (That Don't Involve Dieting!)

And it’s that last one that really irks me: that most people — and especially most women’s — new year’s resolutions center on dieting and weight loss as the key to happiness.

Read...
Bottom line: communicate.

Sex And Eating Disorders: A Guide

Not everyone who has had an eating disorder also has an issue with perfectionism, but the two are often linked: A persistent feeling of never being “good enough” and needing to do something — anything — to feel under control is a warning sign that a person might be susceptible to an eating disorder.

Read...

Let Them Eat Cake: My Weight Restoration Story

And so I slid the scale to the back of my closet, started freely eating doughnuts when I craved doughnuts, and simply donated the jeans that stopped fitting instead of holding out hope for them.

Read...
the author, Melissa Fabello.

What If Body Acceptance Doesn't Work? How About Body Neutrality

Body neutrality is having hot sex with your partner and never overthinking the way that your ass smacks against their thighs. It’s not being embarrassed that you have fat on your body that is affected both by gravity and inertia, nor necessarily feeling sexier because you have fat on your body that is affected both by gravity and inertia. It’s enjoying that moment of intimacy, being comfortable in your body.

Read...