Melissa A. Fabello

Melissa A. Fabello

Bio

Melissa A. Fabello is a sexuality educator, body image and eating disorder activist, and media literacy vlogger based out of Philadelphia. She currently works as a Managing Editor of Everyday Feminism and is a PhD candidate in Human Sexuality Studies. Follow her on Twitter @fyeahmfabello.

Melissa A. Fabello Articles

Fat isn't bad.

3 Tiny Ways That Thin People Can Shift Their Language To Support Fat Acceptance

So you’re on a diet, and you’re really pumped about it. You truly, honestly believe that you’re—say—“getting your body back” post-partum (that’s a harmful concept) or improving your fitness a la the latest technological tracking device (that’s also a harmful concept). And while I think we need to throw a lot of these ideas in the trash, I’m also understanding of how diet culture makes you believe that these are good things – things, in fact, to brag about.

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jealous of a dog.

Inside My Eating Disorder

I was jealous of the dog. “That dog gets to be so thin,” I tried to explain, tearfully, to my partner, “and it doesn’t even have to try. I’ll never be that thin.”

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Bottom line: communicate.

Sex And Eating Disorders: A Guide

Not everyone who has had an eating disorder also has an issue with perfectionism, but the two are often linked: A persistent feeling of never being “good enough” and needing to do something — anything — to feel under control is a warning sign that a person might be susceptible to an eating disorder.

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It's about the shit culture that we live in — one in which sexuality education comes mostly from mainstream pornography and locker room talks, and where disrespect for and objectification of women runs rampant. Image: thinkstock.com

20 Things Guys Have Actually Said To Me In Bed

In my experience dating and sleeping with straight, cisgender dudes who worship hegemonic masculinity, I’ve noticed that there’s something really — umm — special about how they go about sexuality.

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food is important.

3 Ways That Eating Has Changed My Body (For The Better)

What I’ve (amazingly) learned is that if I eat what I want, when I want, and as much of it as I want (what my stomach wants, not my eyes, which are two separate measurements), my digestion regulates itself again.

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4 Actual Solutions You Can Try When You’re Having a Bad Body Image Day

"Just like sitting with your negative feelings, looking at the body that you’re unhappy with puts you in the position of being the boss of your situation. It’s a way of reminding the voices in your head that you are the one in charge here — and that the smallest shift in thought or intent can turn your whole day around."

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the author, Melissa Fabello.

What If Body Acceptance Doesn't Work? How About Body Neutrality

Body neutrality is having hot sex with your partner and never overthinking the way that your ass smacks against their thighs. It’s not being embarrassed that you have fat on your body that is affected both by gravity and inertia, nor necessarily feeling sexier because you have fat on your body that is affected both by gravity and inertia. It’s enjoying that moment of intimacy, being comfortable in your body.

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long distance love . . . it's possible.

Long Distance Dates: How To Date Your Partner 3,000 Miles Away

Another awesome idea, whether the relationship is new or established, is to look at a sexual inventory checklist (like this one). The list goes through different sexual situations that are important to discuss with a partner – from body boundaries to birth control and safer sex options to what you’ve done, what you’d like to try, and what’s a big “no” for you. It’s a great, less-awkward avenue to talking about sex in a big way and to understand one another’s needs more intimately.

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For Love Of Pizza: How My Anorexia Revealed Itself

“I don’t have a problem,” I repeated, this time with my voice raised. And then, spitting defiance, “You’re just jealous.”

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A 3-Step Plan For Asking For Help When You’re Struggling With Your Mental Health

You. Are. Amazing. And I mean that. I want to commend you for all of the hard work that you’re doing to put yourself in a place that feels healthy and happy. And even if you feel like you’re not doing much, you’re clearly doing something by reading this in the first place.

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