Joni Edelman

They will 

Actually, no, I'm not a gluttonous moron.

In today's HELLO, OBVIOUSLY news: National Coffee Day.

My cocktail is wrong. It’s a gin and tonic with only gin. It’s a martini with 10 olives. And I can’t stand the sun. Not today. Not this month.

I'll never forget the day I discovered the name for my mental illness.

No, Bill Cosby isn't my dad. But he was like one to me growing up.

Oh hey remember that time in 1804 when Aaron Burr and Alexander Hamilton had an actual duel, with actual guns and Burr shot Hamilton and Hamilton did not shoot Burr. And then the next day Hamilton died.

My mother didn't teach me how to be a mother. But my babies did.

As the mother of three teens, I'm here to tell you: You have nothing to freak out about.

Suffering is America’s favorite thing to do. We starve ourselves to lose weight, and we’re a success story. We don’t sleep, and we’re just getting SO MUCH DONE. We do a thousand things a day and involve our kids in a thousand activities, because somehow, in some perverted way, that makes us successful.