Christine Schoenwald

Christine Schoenwald

Bio

Christine Schoenwald is a writer, comedian, spoken word diva, and cat lover. She has a degree in Theater Arts and pursued a career in comedy and improv at places like The Groundlings, ACME Comedy Theater, and Bang Comedy Studio before discovering her love for personal narrative/storytelling… well,  that and the fact that she never developed that tough skin that actors are supposed to have or the desire to go on auditions. Her writing has appeared in Salon, The Los Angeles Times, Purple Clover, Bustle, Role Reboot, XoJane, and she’s a regular contributor to Your Tango. She’s performed in storytelling/personal essay shows such as Bawdy Storytelling, The P.E.Z. Show, Tasty Words, Taboo Tales, and many others. Her story Stinkos was nominated for The Pushcart Prize. For more information, please visit Christineschoenwaldwriter.com.

Christine Schoenwald Articles

As a fat person, the thought that I’m already taking up too much space and that it would be selfish to ask for more is always in the back of my mind.

Why Is It So Hard For Me To Ask For More As A Fat Person?

As a fat person, the thought that I’m already taking up too much space and that it would be selfish to ask for more is always in the back of my mind.

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Laverne Cox and Caitlyn Jenner

Why No Woman-From-Birth Should Be Threatened By A Transgender Woman

There isn't a competition between transgender women and cisgender women on who's the better woman. How you express your womanhood is up to you, as is whether or not you want to express it. It'd be better to widen the definition of a woman rather than limit it.

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When the formerly fat spoke of their hardships, I didn’t take them seriously.

Are Formerly Fat People More Fatphobic Than Other People?     

When the formerly fat spoke of their hardships, I didn’t take them seriously. I thought that without the problem of weight, their lives must be perfect.

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I imagine he was surprised that a woman of my size had kicked his ass in our (previously unbeknownst to me) competition.

I'm Done Trying To Be The Perfect Fat Person

Some of our happiest moments are those when we think that no one is watching: when we sing at the top of our lungs in our cars, or we dance down the frozen-food aisle of the supermarket allowing ourselves the freedom to let our inner child out. However, when you’re fat and the fat person’s representative, you don’t get any of those times of abandon because you’re always trying to lead by example and show that you’re the perfect fat person.

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I’m fat, but I have no fat friends.

I'm Fat And I Wish I Had Fat Friends 

I’m fat, but I have no fat friends. It’s not that all my friends are height-weight appropriate — it’s just that I can’t describe them as fat.

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What It's Like Growing Up Terrorized By A Brother With Schizophrenia

My brother, Frederick, was eight when I was born. I don't know if he was happy to have a sister or resented me being born, as it was difficult to get any kind of reading on what he was thinking or feeling. I never felt any love or affection from him — unless his way of showing it was through emotional and physical abuse.

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Ooh la la.

Pretty AND Horny: 10 Beauty Products That Double As Sex Stimulants

Whether you're a high-maintenance kind of woman or a low-maintenance one, chances are high that you use some kind of beauty product. It may be that a bar of soap, or a special shampoo or lipstick. Maybe you have shelves full of moisturizers, conditioners, makeup, and hair products.

Whatever you do, you do a little something, even if it's just to spray a scent on. You may prefer only the simplest of organic products to touch your body or may spend thousands of dollars getting only the finest name brands.

Then there's the question of getting a little something-something to make getting your sexy on even easier, especially if you're not comfortable going to a sex shop. To help you out, here are ten products that will make you feel sexier and intensify your arousal.

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No matter where I am weight-wise, this isn’t a fat suit that I can take off, and I can’t rely on it to keep me safe — that’s something I have to do for myself.

My Fat Doesn't Protect Me; I Have To Do That For Myself

Sexual assault doesn’t discriminate based on body weight, and none of us should take our safety for granted. My fat doesn't protect me.

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Fat camp would be a piece of cake — that I wouldn’t be allowed to eat.

I'm A Fat Camp Survivor ​

I’m a survivor — of fat camp. How terrible could a weight-loss camp be? Well, it was bad enough that I’m still dealing with its after-effects decades later.

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