Christine Schoenwald

Christine Schoenwald

Bio

Christine Schoenwald is a writer, comedian, spoken word diva, and cat lover. She has a degree in Theater Arts and pursued a career in comedy and improv at places like The Groundlings, ACME Comedy Theater, and Bang Comedy Studio before discovering her love for personal narrative/storytelling… well,  that and the fact that she never developed that tough skin that actors are supposed to have or the desire to go on auditions. Her writing has appeared in Salon, The Los Angeles Times, Purple Clover, Bustle, Role Reboot, XoJane, and she’s a regular contributor to Your Tango. She’s performed in storytelling/personal essay shows such as Bawdy Storytelling, The P.E.Z. Show, Tasty Words, Taboo Tales, and many others. Her story Stinkos was nominated for The Pushcart Prize. For more information, please visit Christineschoenwaldwriter.com.

Christine Schoenwald Articles

I imagine he was surprised that a woman of my size had kicked his ass in our (previously unbeknownst to me) competition.

I'm Done Trying To Be The Perfect Fat Person

Some of our happiest moments are those when we think that no one is watching: when we sing at the top of our lungs in our cars, or we dance down the frozen-food aisle of the supermarket allowing ourselves the freedom to let our inner child out. However, when you’re fat and the fat person’s representative, you don’t get any of those times of abandon because you’re always trying to lead by example and show that you’re the perfect fat person.

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When the formerly fat spoke of their hardships, I didn’t take them seriously.

Are Formerly Fat People More Fatphobic Than Other People?     

When the formerly fat spoke of their hardships, I didn’t take them seriously. I thought that without the problem of weight, their lives must be perfect.

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Depression isn't as simple as you thought it was.

6 Brutal Truths About Depression That Doctors Aren't Telling You

Depression isn't just about being unhappy about something or feeling blue; it's a legitimate and very serious medical condition with many emotional, physical, behavioral and cognitive symptoms. It isn't inevitable for anyone living in the modern world, and it also doesn't mean that you're a bad or weak person if you suffer from depression.

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Yeah, fat people exercise too. (Image Credit: Think Stock)

I'm Overweight And Get Fat-Shamed When I Exercise

I’m riding my bike around a local community center on a Sunday morning.

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Ooh la la.

Pretty AND Horny: 10 Beauty Products That Double As Sex Stimulants

Whether you're a high-maintenance kind of woman or a low-maintenance one, chances are high that you use some kind of beauty product. It may be that a bar of soap, or a special shampoo or lipstick. Maybe you have shelves full of moisturizers, conditioners, makeup, and hair products.

Whatever you do, you do a little something, even if it's just to spray a scent on. You may prefer only the simplest of organic products to touch your body or may spend thousands of dollars getting only the finest name brands.

Then there's the question of getting a little something-something to make getting your sexy on even easier, especially if you're not comfortable going to a sex shop. To help you out, here are ten products that will make you feel sexier and intensify your arousal.

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Fat camp would be a piece of cake — that I wouldn’t be allowed to eat.

I'm A Fat Camp Survivor ​

I’m a survivor — of fat camp. How terrible could a weight-loss camp be? Well, it was bad enough that I’m still dealing with its after-effects decades later.

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No matter where I am weight-wise, this isn’t a fat suit that I can take off, and I can’t rely on it to keep me safe — that’s something I have to do for myself.

My Fat Doesn't Protect Me; I Have To Do That For Myself

Sexual assault doesn’t discriminate based on body weight, and none of us should take our safety for granted. My fat doesn't protect me.

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Weighing someone with witnesses isn’t just an evasion of privacy; it’s embarrassing.

I Don't Want Witnesses When I'm Weighed

I know there are far worse injustices happening in the world, but getting weighed in front of people smacks of fat-shaming, and feels incredibly invasive.

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A therapist once told me that my ability to live in a place of constant fear was impressive, but it’s taken its toll.

My Fear And Anxiety Threesome

I’m in an ongoing threesome with fear and anxiety.

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"When my body cried and begged me to be kinder to it, I ignored its requests for compassion and continued to beat myself up." Image: Thinkstock

I Was My Body's Bully

“You’re fat and ugly,” I’d hear, or, “Look at your stomach, it’s disgusting!” This wasn’t a neighborhood bully taunting me on my way to school — this is what I said to myself all day long, well into adulthood.

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