Rebekah Kuschmider

We interrupt this dumpster fire that is the United States of America in 2017 to bring you what is probably the most horrifying news in the history

Yeah, no. No one wants their bottle of body wash to look like their actual body.

If you could get your period to last only 20 minutes, would you?

This election season so far has raised a series of questions.

President Obama plans to visit a mosque in Baltimore, MD. He’s going there to speak about the problems associated with global anti-Islamic bigotry and to promote religious tolerance. He delivered a similar message about anti-Semitism at the Israeli embassy last week.

The manatees were engaged in a little mutual oral pleasure — or, as the kids call it, 69. Way to go, manatees!

Am I betraying the core values of feminism by voting for a man when there’s a woman candidate in the race?

I can’t speak for all feminists but I don’t have any guns for two reasons. First, I don’t hunt because I don’t want to eat any of the kinds of meat one can shoot in my region. Second, I have little kids. I know some people think having a gun around is a great way to protect little kids from potential threats but I see them as threats in and of themselves.

The Russian meddling, the Kremlin favoring his father, the offer to provide information with material value to the Trump campaign. Did Donald Trump Jr. know it was illegal? I dunno. But he went ahead and did it all anyway.

There’s a new drug hitting the hottest clubs in Europe, and I suspect it’ll soon cross the pond to America. Or maybe it’s already here — in your cabinet, desk drawer, or the end-caps at your grocery store.