Rebekah Kuschmider

A guy named Dave Johnson swears up and down that the Ramsey family staged the whole thing and then went on to live new lives as the Perry family. He cites Katy Perry’s eyebrows as proof. "You know, the eyebrows don't change much on a person," he claims. "You're born with your eyebrows.”

There is no form of involuntary infertility that isn’t heartbreaking, and suffering from multiple miscarriages is no exception.

So. The election. Yeah.

What trans people are — unfortunately — is a handy punching bag for a wildly unpopular president. This man with his approval rating hovering under 40%, with his family under scrutiny for shady financial and political dealings, with his entire policy agenda — such as it is, considering he knows fuckall about policy — in jeopardy due to grassroots opposition to it, this man is flailing around looking for a distraction.

One thing that is absolutely true is that Donald Trump insults everyone. He’s been loser-ing and dummy-ing his way across the slate of GOP presidential hopefuls for months now. It’s actually jaw-droppingly awful, because it’s pretty evident that he insults EVERYONE. He can’t pull it together enough to be polite under any circumstance, which means he would turn a state dinner into a Real Housewives-style table-turning circus. In fact, I could see him calling Netanyahu a “prostitution whore” and that terrifies me.

Not a Muslim ban, but some non-Muslims will get to the top of the list faster? Uh-huh. Make of that what you will, folks, but it sure sounds like an unconstitutional religious test to me.

Remember a couple of weeks ago when we got all excited to find out that the

“Sometimes a lady has to be told when she’s being nasty.”

Buckle up folks, the Senate Democrats just announced they have enough members opposing confirmation of

So why are you still sitting here reading this? Get up! Grab your keys! Go get a doughnut!