Rebekah Kuschmider

Some of Republican senators' discomfort with voting for their health bill is due to groups of frantic activists who have been pummeling the Senate phone lines, showing up at Senate offices, and even staging a “People’s Filibuster” by rallying on the steps of the Capitol. All of them are begging their elected officials to represent the interests of the sick and the poor, not just the rich and powerful.

I got a puppy last fall, and I’ve spent about a zillion dollars on different things for her to chew. She really likes bully sticks, which are dehydrated bull penises. It cracks me up every time I give one to her and say, “Here. Go eat a dick.”

If you could get your period to last only 20 minutes, would you?

I was all set to write a lighthearted piece here about KFC’s new line of flavored nail polish. Yes, you did read that right. KFC has a line of nail polishes that come in “original recipe” and “hot and spicy” and they would LITERALLY make your nails finger lickin’ good. I mean OMG! Sadly, they’re only available in Hong Kong.

Woohoo! Sex is good for your brain! IT’S SCIENCE!

Yes. That’s right. Texas passed laws to allegedly make abortion safer when abortion is already nearly perfectly safe. Our good friend Justice Breyer honed in on this yesterday, when he asked the lawyer defending the law how often Texas patients are transferred from abortion provider to hospital.

Maybe grown-ups do their best physical work in a spin class with an instructor telling us when to stand up and when to sit down, but kids get enough of that kind of structure in the classroom. What they really need is more time to do their own thing.

Like Gwyneth, I’m a mom of two kids, so I’m kind of hung up on the fact that she has the time to take a whole bath every night. I usually only manage to squeeze in a prison shower after the kids are in bed and before I collapse, so this brush-and-bathe routine is really amazing to me.

So why are you still sitting here reading this? Get up! Grab your keys! Go get a doughnut!

Allegedly, Botox in the scrotum can relax the scrotal sack and allow the balls to drop more, making them look more prominent. It also makes the scrotum less wrinkly. The guy in the video was pleased with the results and said his girlfriend was pleased as well. Same with the guy in Cosmo. So, that’s two happy customers who were willing to share their experience with the world wide web.