Rebekah Kuschmider

Brace yourselves, folks. I may be about to present you with the best news of 2016: ice cream for breakfast can make you smarter!

Last night, rapper Killer Mike was stumping for Bernie Sanders when he made a statement regarding the intersection of biology and politics that has pundits scratching their heads.

Lakeland Florida authorities were summoned by an alert citizen who told them, “I've got a dead body over here in the lake. Uh, it looks like an alligator is trying to pull it down under.”

Someone is going to try and tell you that John McCain saved Obamacare. Or Lisa Murkowski. Or Susan Collins. But it was you. YOU.

One escort interviewed said she was changing $620 PER HOUR for the “girlfriend experience,” which includes taking her to films and walking the red carpet at events. She has a strict 4- and 5-star hotel policy. No yacht parties though, for safety reasons.

You can’t deal either, can you? Of course you can’t. So listen: let’s stop talking about this scum-sucking-bottom-feeder and focus on something happy. Like a puppy finding a home and a job.

In the latest example of Pope Francis being more connected with reality than pretty much anyone else in Catholic leadership, the Holy Father sugges

Apparently, there is a type of wasp that deposits its larvae inside oak trees, where they grow inside the wood, nourished on oak bark and wasp poop. You can collect these wasp incubators — called oak galls — and do stuff with them. The Etsy seller says they’re good for all kinds of “traditional” medicinal uses like tightening the vagina and uterus after childbirth. THIS IS A BAD IDEA!

Legendary author J.K. Rowling is begging fans of her series about the young wizard not to purchase a handwritten, 800-word story she wrote as a prequel to the Potter tales.

Yesterday, former New York Mayor and billionaire Michael Bloomberg announced he will not mount a third party bid for the White House.