Sex + Love

Over the course of 12 years, I’ve had relationships with eight men: lived with three, planned for marriage three times, and followed through with marriage once. But it has only been within the past six months that I have started dating with intention.

About a year and a half ago, I started having something a little strange go down in my nether regions.

What if I said that the reason your man cheated had absolutely nothing to do with you?

5. No one person can meet all your needs. Expecting your partner to meet all your needs is a recipe for disaster. There is no one person on earth who can single handedly meet all your social, intellectual, sexual, physical, and emotional needs.

Unlike the exercise and dieting regimes you have to stick to for quite some time before seeing any effects, here are just three things you can do that will have an immediate positive impact on the quality and depth of your relationship.

Chances are you are doing something that you’re not necessarily aware of that is screwing up your relationships. It’s causing you a lot of pain and discourse with your significant other. This “thing” is the source of nearly every argument, it’s the germination of all resentments, and it ultimately leaves you disconnected with the one you love. The one thing you and I do to screw up our relationships is…we have expectations.

The player — His shady behavior raises suspicions, and he never seems to elaborate on what he’s been doing. His phone constantly bleeps which he deliberately ignores (“must be the mother again…”) before switching it off.

My brief experience with online dating taught me that I hate it with a fiery passion. As a woman, I felt objectified and like a lot of the men on there wanted to see pictures of me so that they could judge if I was hot enough to go out for coffee with. I was already resentful and angry. And I know that I’m not alone. My female friends who have been involved in online dating have commiserated with me on this.