Carrie Saum

Insisting on capability robs us of vulnerability. It robs us of the village we so desperately need. It creates resentment and mistrust. And most of all, it sets us up to fail.

In the spirit of melted chocolate and simple, decadent expressions of love, I made a little treat for my friends.

I’m writing this, and I don’t even fully know how to tell you to slow down during your busy life because the truth is, I’m learning how to do this myself.

It was a life-altering mouthgasm of flavor explosions, and I totally wanted to pack my bags for India and Bali to have my own Eat Pray Love experience.

The shame was overwhelming. Why was my body broken? What had I done to my baby? I began to spiral into self-loathing. Gestational diabetes felt like a failure.

But seriously, Babywatchers. STOP IT. It’s none of your business. Commenting on a woman’s body in general without any solicitation from the woman is not only unwanted, it’s inappropriate.

The holiday season presents numerous opportunities to celebrate and be with people we love and enjoy. It's also a constant source of potential triggers, just waiting to burst to the surface. Infinite stimulation creates a perfect storm to drown all of us in the overwhelm. As fun as the holidays can be, they can be a deep well of anxiety and exhaustion. Over the last decade, I've discovered what works best for me in regards to managing the holiday deluge. So, here's what's worked for me.

The first time I ate a mushroom at Gram's summertime table (with me sporting a full coverage one piece and neon shorts, and her in a ruffled pink bikini), it was raw. All I tasted was dirt. I swore off them forever. So, she made them for dinner.

Because here's the thing. Kindness is the antidote to the poison being pedaled by the Trumps of the world. Your anger is valid and important, and your despair should never be overlooked. And you can be all of the things, feel all of the feelings, ardently and vigorously defend the most vulnerable among us, say all of the words you need to say, and act with an undercurrent of kindness.

Am I the only one who gets pumped about using a crockpot during the colder months?